I don't know how to go home
11-21-2013, 06:12 PM,
Post: #1
I don't know how to go home
It's true; it's midnight, I just got home from work Goth

I am really bad at leaving and don't know how to do it. Part of it is because I have nothing better to do, part of it is because there are things that need doing, and part is because I simply don't care; it's all the same. Anyone else have this problem?
fizzwinkus wrote Wrote:
Goaty wrote Wrote:"Just Bing it" sounds like an invitation to a quickie.
Isn't microsoft's wp7 motto "get in and get out"?
11-21-2013, 09:32 PM,
Post: #2
RE: I don't know how to go home
Hell no, they don't pay me enough to make work my life. Work to live, brother.

If you don't have anything to do outside of work, it's probably because you're always working. You'll find something. Maybe you'll start turning wrenches again, maybe you'll learn a programming language, maybe -- and I don't want to get your hopes up here -- you'll meet a girl.
bedstuy Wrote:mocking a pair of $500 jeans is a form of class warfare... why do you hate my social status?
11-22-2013, 12:02 AM,
Post: #3
RE: I don't know how to go home
Get a motorcycle. You'll want to be out riding all the time...

I kinda have the same problem. I'm senior to other devs at work so I either need to provide them guidance or perform tasks that they don't have privileges to do. I get in early, they all tend to roll in later, so it makes leaving in time hard. I actually set calendar reminders that tell me to go home.
The chaos army seems suspiciously well organized.
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11-22-2013, 12:34 AM,
Post: #4
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-21-2013, 06:12 PM)WindowsBreakerG4 Wrote: Anyone else have this problem?

I certainly did for a while. I know exactly what you're talking about. I would come in at 6 and leave as late as 11 more often than not. This lasted a couple of months at least. I'd had a big Drupal project dropped on me, so I buried myself in it. (Drupal is a motherfucker… it's awesome, but a motherfucker.) I used that to deal with a Bad Time. Ultimately I hit burnout, which made things worse.

It feels like you're standing there waving bye-bye to the last fuck you'll ever give.

End result: a proper bit of bootstrapping and some really good friends (one in particular) got me out of that pit.

But friends can't do much if you don't MAKE yourself leave. Find something to do. it's a job, it is not a replacement for life. Go listen to live music in small venues. talk to people. Buy someone a drink with no ulterior motives. Hike/bike trails, find groups in your area with similar interests.

Years and years ago, The Troll™ went back to college. When not working I was Bored Beyond Belief as she was either in class or studying. Her prescription: "Go find some people to hang out with that are as weird as you are." So even tho I wasn't a student, I went to a meeting of the university's Science Fiction and Fantasy Society. That did the trick. (Shortly after I got a job as bus driver for the university, which got me front-and-enter with co-eds Brows Wink but i digress…)

Gippy Wrote:Get a motorcycle. You'll want to be out riding all the time...

For myself, this is absolutely true. There's a road about an hour away at a place called Canyon of the Eagles, where the observatory for my amateur astronomy group is located. It's twisty-turny-curvy-uphill-downhill beautifully-maintained smooth awesomeness that's BEGGING for a chance to cradle two wheels on its blacktop perfection. I hate driving it because: DRIVING. But riding? OMFG. Lots of roads that are awesome for riding around here. Texas Hill Country, baby! Wuv

fuckinghell, i want a bike...

Doesn't have to be riding, but find something. GTFO of the office.
Obscurum veritas defensor

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11-22-2013, 12:40 AM,
Post: #5
RE: I don't know how to go home
Whatever you do, don't go into management. Everyone hates the manager who doesn't have anything to go home to.
smapdi Wrote:I do declare that losing one's anal virginity sure is a memorable time.
11-22-2013, 02:32 AM,
Post: #6
RE: I don't know how to go home
[Image: office-space-initech-bill-lumbergh.jpg]
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11-22-2013, 02:32 AM,
Post: #7
RE: I don't know how to go home
I'm trying to commit myself to skateboarding for about an hour every day so I don't have to just wonder what to do after work.
11-22-2013, 04:49 AM,
Post: #8
RE: I don't know how to go home
Have you tried Video games? To try it out you can pick up a Wii/Wii Mini and some of it's best games for dirt cheap. If it's not a time suck I don't know what is.
My logic is infallible. Resistance is futile.
11-22-2013, 06:09 AM, (This post was last modified: 11-22-2013, 06:11 AM by WindowsBreakerG4.)
Post: #9
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-21-2013, 09:32 PM)roo Wrote: Hell no, they don't pay me enough to make work my life. Work to live, brother.

If you don't have anything to do outside of work, it's probably because you're always working. You'll find something. Maybe you'll start turning wrenches again, maybe you'll learn a programming language, maybe -- and I don't want to get your hopes up here -- you'll meet a girl.
Here in lies part of my problem, I have no place to wrench, I live in a room that is 11.5' x 11.5' with a bathroom. I have no kitchen, I have no garage. For this space i pay an extremely cheap (by MTV standards) $640 a month. If I want to find a place with a garage I am looking at 2k a month. I can't swing that. Real estate here makes me Shakefist

I have looked at moving some place more affordable, but commuting 4 or 5 hours every day erases all the time anyway. Google has commuter buses but traffic is now so gridlocked in the bay area it doesn't matter much. Sadly google is not close to the light rail in MTV, and in the morning it takes roughly 15-20 minutes to go 4 miles from the light rail to campus.

I have a friend who has a shop 2 cities down but at 6PM at night it takes me roughly 40 minutes to go 7 miles Goth by the time I get there he's leaving for the night to go to his GFs generally.

All I have found to do in MTV is go drinking.

(11-22-2013, 12:02 AM)Gippy Wrote: Get a motorcycle. You'll want to be out riding all the time...
I almost die enough on G Bikes doing stupid things!

(11-22-2013, 12:02 AM)Gippy Wrote: I kinda have the same problem. I'm senior to other devs at work so I either need to provide them guidance or perform tasks that they don't have privileges to do. I get in early, they all tend to roll in later, so it makes leaving in time hard. I actually set calendar reminders that tell me to go home.
I have a similar issue, everyone else I work with commutes from far away (today for example they'll spend 8 hours commuting round trip) so when things don't get done I do them. Part because I have to, part because that's just who I am. Google serving dinner at 7 PM doesn't help this either, I'll pretty much always stay for dinner since I don't have a kitchen.


(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote:
(11-21-2013, 06:12 PM)WindowsBreakerG4 Wrote: Anyone else have this problem?

I certainly did for a while. I know exactly what you're talking about. I would come in at 6 and leave as late as 11 more often than not. This lasted a couple of months at least.
I am not quite that bad but I've been working 8:30 to 9 or 10ish for 4 or 5 months now.

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote: I'd had a big Drupal project dropped on me, so I buried myself in it. (Drupal is a motherfucker… it's awesome, but a motherfucker.)

This 100% It's so awesome but daunting

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote: I used that to deal with a Bad Time. Ultimately I hit burnout, which made things worse.
I guess i am kinda doing that. I am starting to burn out pretty bad

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote: It feels like you're standing there waving bye-bye to the last fuck you'll ever give.
I have been out of fucks to give for about a month now

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote: End result: a proper bit of bootstrapping and some really good friends (one in particular) got me out of that pit.
Friends here would be nice. Usually I make friends through work, and I've made a few, sadly everyone commutes in. I have a few friends who are localish but they aren't around M-F due to work

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote: But friends can't do much if you don't MAKE yourself leave. Find something to do. it's a job, it is not a replacement for life. Go listen to live music in small venues. talk to people. Buy someone a drink with no ulterior motives. Hike/bike trails, find groups in your area with similar interests.
I've gone to the bar a few times. It's ok. IDK I guess I should do that more

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote: Years and years ago, The Troll™ went back to college. When not working I was Bored Beyond Belief as she was either in class or studying. Her prescription: "Go find some people to hang out with that are as weird as you are." So even tho I wasn't a student, I went to a meeting of the university's Science Fiction and Fantasy Society. That did the trick. (Shortly after I got a job as bus driver for the university, which got me front-and-enter with co-eds Brows Wink but i digress…)
That's good advice, i've been networking with the car people and we hang out some on the weekends.

(11-22-2013, 12:34 AM)Og Wrote:
Gippy Wrote:Get a motorcycle. You'll want to be out riding all the time...

For myself, this is absolutely true. There's a road about an hour away at a place called Canyon of the Eagles, where the observatory for my amateur astronomy group is located. It's twisty-turny-curvy-uphill-downhill beautifully-maintained smooth awesomeness that's BEGGING for a chance to cradle two wheels on its blacktop perfection. I hate driving it because: DRIVING. But riding? OMFG. Lots of roads that are awesome for riding around here. Texas Hill Country, baby! Wuv

fuckinghell, i want a bike...

Doesn't have to be riding, but find something. GTFO of the office.
I like driving, during non rush hour i am 20 min from some great roads, but from 4 pm till 8 PM i am more like 45 to an hour.


I am sure this sounds like I am making lots of excuses but idk. I don't think living in the bay area is for me. I've been job hunting. I love being on the road and my boss' boss is pulling me off the road because "You're too valuable to have out of the office." When I am on the road I do what I have to, and I am done, I go explore and go and hit the road again. It's great. I don't worry about email, once I am done for the day, I'm done. It's freedom.

That was part of living in my shitty place; it's cheap but I wasn't there a ton so it wasn't so bad. I think a big part of my problem is my living situation but I don't see any way of changing it for the better without being absolutely broke.

(11-22-2013, 04:49 AM)FuturDreamz Wrote: Have you tried Video games? To try it out you can pick up a Wii/Wii Mini and some of it's best games for dirt cheap. If it's not a time suck I don't know what is.

I have a PS3, it's currently at work, I could take it home, it doesn't really matter. I was playing GTA V which is a time suck but idk I just kinda stopped caring. I've never been one to get really sucked into games.
fizzwinkus wrote Wrote:
Goaty wrote Wrote:"Just Bing it" sounds like an invitation to a quickie.
Isn't microsoft's wp7 motto "get in and get out"?
11-22-2013, 06:42 AM,
Post: #10
RE: I don't know how to go home
It may depend on the game. Nintendo is really really good at making really fun games. It would be worth it to find a cheap system (gamecube, Wii, ds) on craigslist just to try it out. I think you would love windwaker (either version) or paper Mario.
My logic is infallible. Resistance is futile.
11-22-2013, 08:44 AM,
Post: #11
RE: I don't know how to go home
WB: ignore potardo.
bedstuy Wrote:mocking a pair of $500 jeans is a form of class warfare... why do you hate my social status?
11-22-2013, 09:02 AM,
Post: #12
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 08:44 AM)roo Wrote: WB: ignore potardo.

Got a valid reason besides an ad hominem attack?
My logic is infallible. Resistance is futile.
11-22-2013, 09:20 AM,
Post: #13
RE: I don't know how to go home
Because your advice of swapping one form of isolation for another is über-potarded.
Obscurum veritas defensor

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11-22-2013, 09:21 AM, (This post was last modified: 11-22-2013, 09:25 AM by tobobo.)
Post: #14
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 09:02 AM)FuturDreamz Wrote:
(11-22-2013, 08:44 AM)roo Wrote: WB: ignore potardo.

Got a valid reason besides an ad hominem attack?

video games are great fun but are undoubtedly a form of escapism, not a way to create an attractive environment at home that you can look forward to at the end of the day. It takes considerable effort to create a living space where you can really feel comfortable. Finding new ways to consume media is going to be more of a distraction from that goal than a path towards it.

I love video games. I also love buying shit, watching TV, browsing Reddit, and smoking weed. I'm not so stupid to think that's enough for a fulfilling life.

WB: Tried joining any meetup groups? I've pretty much only heard good things. I've been to the Ember meetups in SF a few times—they're good fun and people are there to meet people. Most groups are even more casual—there are some beer meetups in SF I've been eyeing, as well as some related to speaking spanish and other random adventures.
11-22-2013, 09:34 AM,
Post: #15
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 09:21 AM)tobobo Wrote:
(11-22-2013, 09:02 AM)FuturDreamz Wrote:
(11-22-2013, 08:44 AM)roo Wrote: WB: ignore potardo.

Got a valid reason besides an ad hominem attack?

video games are great fun but are undoubtedly a form of escapism, not a way to create an attractive environment at home that you can look forward to at the end of the day. It takes considerable effort to create a living space where you can really feel comfortable. Finding new ways to consume media is going to be more of a distraction from that goal than a path towards it.

I love video games. I also love buying shit, watching TV, browsing Reddit, and smoking weed. I'm not so stupid to think that's enough for a fulfilling life.

It isn't enough for a fulfilling life, but it gets you out of the workplace. Depending on the game it's a nice temporary distraction that will cheer you up and make you stop thinking about work.
My logic is infallible. Resistance is futile.
11-22-2013, 09:46 AM,
Post: #16
RE: I don't know how to go home
potardo is his own form of ad hom attack.
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11-22-2013, 10:06 AM,
Post: #17
RE: I don't know how to go home
He has a way with words.

A way to assure everyone he has no fucking clue.
11-22-2013, 11:15 AM, (This post was last modified: 11-22-2013, 11:17 AM by roo.)
Post: #18
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 09:02 AM)FuturDreamz Wrote:
(11-22-2013, 08:44 AM)roo Wrote: WB: ignore potardo.

Got a valid reason besides an ad hominem attack?

Yes, I do. Thanks for asking.

But I'm not convinced that I need one.

(11-22-2013, 09:21 AM)tobobo Wrote: WB: Tried joining any meetup groups?


Meetups are a great idea! I've gone to web development and web security meetups. I've met neat folks.
bedstuy Wrote:mocking a pair of $500 jeans is a form of class warfare... why do you hate my social status?
11-22-2013, 01:37 PM,
Post: #19
RE: I don't know how to go home
Looks like almost all the ones in MTV are related to coding or otherwise computer related. Look to be some good ones in SF, I'll keep an eye on some weekend ones. Driving to SF from here is becoming increasingly hard

http://www.mercurynews.com/breaking-news/ci_24486581/traffic-jams-paralyzing-bay-area?source=most_viewed
fizzwinkus wrote Wrote:
Goaty wrote Wrote:"Just Bing it" sounds like an invitation to a quickie.
Isn't microsoft's wp7 motto "get in and get out"?
11-22-2013, 03:18 PM,
Post: #20
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 12:40 AM)Geesie Wrote: Whatever you do, don't go into management. Everyone hates the manager who doesn't have anything to go home to.

Sad
Airman Dan
11-22-2013, 04:31 PM,
Post: #21
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 01:37 PM)WindowsBreakerG4 Wrote: Looks like almost all the ones in MTV are related to coding or otherwise computer related. Look to be some good ones in SF, I'll keep an eye on some weekend ones. Driving to SF from here is becoming increasingly hard

http://www.mercurynews.com/breaking-news/ci_24486581/traffic-jams-paralyzing-bay-area?source=most_viewed

Let me know if you find one that looks cool in SF and I'll hit it up with you.
11-23-2013, 04:38 AM,
Post: #22
RE: I don't know how to go home
Had plans for the weekend now i am being asked (more like told) to work during it.

Tobobobobobo wanna get hammered saturday night? Imma need it. This week has been a cluster f

[Image: billlumbergh.jpg]

Goth
fizzwinkus wrote Wrote:
Goaty wrote Wrote:"Just Bing it" sounds like an invitation to a quickie.
Isn't microsoft's wp7 motto "get in and get out"?
11-23-2013, 05:11 AM,
Post: #23
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-23-2013, 04:38 AM)WindowsBreakerG4 Wrote: Had plans for the weekend now i am being asked (more like told) to work during it.

Tobobobobobo wanna get hammered saturday night? Imma need it. This week has been a cluster f

[Image: billlumbergh.jpg]

Goth

I think I might be going to a friend's party in Oakland—I'll let you know. It's a complicated weekend cause I gotta work all weekend too. Goth
11-23-2013, 01:18 PM,
Post: #24
RE: I don't know how to go home
Got out of working all weekend.

What kind of work are you doing all weekend? Going out in MTV tonight
fizzwinkus wrote Wrote:
Goaty wrote Wrote:"Just Bing it" sounds like an invitation to a quickie.
Isn't microsoft's wp7 motto "get in and get out"?
11-28-2013, 08:53 AM,
Post: #25
RE: I don't know how to go home
(11-22-2013, 03:18 PM)Dan Wrote:
(11-22-2013, 12:40 AM)Geesie Wrote: Whatever you do, don't go into management. Everyone hates the manager who doesn't have anything to go home to.

Sad

Toby. Smile


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